Adolescents and their Parents: The Importance of Mutual Perceptions for the Self-Esteem of Young People

The aim of the article is to describe contemporary psychological views of the relationship between parents and adolescent children. The first part deals with intergenerational relations. It is based on a historical perspective and presents more recent research in the field. It has been shown that over the 20‘*’ century traditional conflict between the generations has very much weakened, and if there are conflicts in a family, they have often already appeared in childhood. The key factors are parental interest, emotional involvement and the basis of parental authority. If adolescents feel that they can freely express their opinions and that their parents will listen, conflicts do not have such an impact. The second part of the article presents the results of our research focused on the relationship between parents’ perceptions and evaluation and the self-esteem of adolescents. It emerges that the perceived warmth of the parent of the same sex is a very good indica tor of self-esteem. Girls are more sensitive to negative expressions from the side of parents, and boys more resistant. Boys are, however, more sensitive to positive aspects and the atmosphere of family life. Other findings show that the parental influence on self-image works in different ways and that there is no basis for the simple idea that the influence of parents diminishes with the increasing age of the adolescent while the influence of peers increases. Instead, what seem important are the kinds of context in which parental influence operates. Here the crucial factor is to achieve mutual acceptance and respect. Where this happens and adolescents experience the feeling that their parents accept them as they are, then it is much more likely that they will internalise the parental evaluation and link it up with the autonomous element of self-image. If acceptance and the acceptance of the parental evaluation does not take place, the meaning of the parental judgments changes - they become connected with the required self (out-selQ, i.e. with the system of extemal rules, norms, requirements and restrictions.